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The Superwoman Syndrome: Why We Need to Hit Pause and Prioritize Ourselves

An older black woman with a large grey afro wearing a sexy superwoman costume. When do we stop trying to save everyone but ourselves?

Hey there, fabulous fifty, sixty, seventy and above.... soul sisters!

Today, let's talk about a topic that hits close to home for many of us: the Superwoman Syndrome. You know the drill - juggling a gazillion responsibilities, wearing exhaustion like a badge of honor, and thinking we can conquer the world with a single bound. But here is a Public Safety Announcement.... even superheroes need to recharge their capes.

Picture this: you and your girls are enjoying yourselves at a church sponsored event. One of you asks where is (let's call her) Connie. Connie invited you but you don't see her anywhere. Suddenly she bursts into the room like a tornado of energy, quickly moving from table to table. You hear her ask at every table, "what can I get you", is everything alright", how about another this or that". When she stops at your table, she doesn't take even five minutes to sit down, say hi and take a breath before she's off to the next. Now it would be one thing is this was a "once in a while" activity for Connie, but this is how "Connie" is ALL THE TIME! In every aspect of her life, taking care of everyone's needs but her own.

Sound familiar? Yeah, we all have that "FRIEND" (hint, hint). Let's call her... well, let's call her....... "Me." Yep, I've been there, done that, and got the burnout to prove it. It's the classic tale of "I'll take care of myself after I do just this one more thing." But guess what? That one more thing never seems to end. Let's be honest. Do you see her when YOU look in the mirror?

A tired looking latino woman wearing a wonderwoman dress and hugging an elderly woman with gray hair in a wheelchair who is wearing a wonder woman t-shirt. Trying to be a superwoman is a passed down - learned behavior.

Here we are, channeling our inner Wonder Woman, believing we can save the day without breaking a sweat. Spoiler alert: I don't know about you, but I've been sweating. A LOT! But hey, we're on a mission, fueled by caffeine and sheer determination and maybe even some Red Bull to give us wings. And sleep...who needs that anyway, right?

But then reality hits and it hits hard. Our bodies rebelled, our energy hits rock bottom, and suddenly we can barely lift a finger, let alone save the world. Finally, there's a revelation. An "aha" moment. At last, we get it (at least for now).

It took hitting rock bottom to realize that we can't pour from an empty pitcher, no matter how small the cup is. And no amount of multitasking or people-pleasing can fill the void where self-care should've been. Thank God we hear the wakeup call and decide to listen - not just to the chaos of the world around us, but to that still, small voice within us.

Call it intuition, call it divine guidance, or call it acknowledging the wisdom that God has shared with each of us. Call it whatever floats your boat. But for me, it was a gentle nudge from the Spirit within (my inner GPS) reminding me to slow down, tune in, and prioritize my own well-being for once.


Ok, so no, it didn't happen quite that way. Actually, someone I love dearly paid the price for being Connie (remember her?). Although she is on the mend, she faced a life-threatening situation that could have cost her...her life. She was the one receiving the wakeup call. But watching her, I heard it too. Loud and clear!!!!

But I'm not alone on this journey. We're all in this together, driving down this highway of self-discovery and self-love. And on this road, there are so many detours and side streets. These side roads take us to places we never thought we would visit. To people we didn't know would need our help. On routes where we get turned around and loose our way. But guess what? (that sounds like my pastor) We have a secret weapon at our disposal: wisdom.

Yep, you heard me right. Whether it's the voice of God, the whispers of our intuition, or the timeless wisdom found in scriptures, we have all the guidance we need to navigate this crazy thing called life and find our balance - if only we'd listen, learn, and live it. Here's a word of wisdom: Galatians 6:10 says whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone.  And Matthew 23:39 tells us, "And the second is equally important, love your neighbor as yourself". So built right into the scripture is the command to do good to love yourself. If we are commanded to love and be good to our neighbors and love them as we love ourselves, then we must love ourselves -- in an unselfish way -- first.

The author with her finger to her ear, gesturing that one should listen.

So, my fellow travelers, let's make a pact to ditch the Superwoman act and embrace our beautifully imperfect selves. Let's listen to the whispers of our hearts, the nudges of the universe, and the timeless truths that have guided humanity for centuries.

Because here's the thing: life is too short to spend it running on empty. And too short to be stuck on the side streets (or stuck on stupid).

So let's hit pause, take a deep breath, and remember that in a world full of other people's needs, one that will suck us dry and leave us on empty, one of our greatest acts in being a "she'ro" is choosing to make our well-being and happiness a priority.

Until next time, my legacy leaving lovelies, listen to your inner voice, heed the wisdom of the ages, and remember that you too are worthy of all the love and care you so freely give to others.

With love, light, and a sprinkle of divine guidance,


Rev. Sunae

Blessed By Your Words (Lifted by your love)

We help you share and preserve your love and your legacy!

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